[Begun Saturday, June 30th]
My mind is a bit all over the place these days, so forgive me if this entry is a bit hard to follow. Even though I'm not sure who's been reading this blog, it gives me encouragement to know that there are people a world away reading this and being encouraged or moved to pray. I appreciate you all a lot, and I only wish I could be more direct in my communication with you!
Life in Halifax is becoming stressful. Teammates especially are noticing that I'm running on empty these days, and it's starting to get to me. I've been ranting a lot about how much there is to do and how little time there is to do it, and generally being frustrated. There are pinholes of light throughout my week, where I remember that God's got all this in His hand and I really just have to 'show up' with a useable attitude, but as life becomes busier and busier, I find myself becoming, well, cranky.
And it hurts. It hurts the people I'm short with when I haven't had enough sleep, it hurts people who are just trying to show kindness or ask a simple question and I'm impatient with them. And it hurts me, because I don't want to hurt others. In my frustration though, I tend to lash out. Given the option fight or flight, I'm usually all fight. Looking at these words in front of me, however, I don't feel anger. I feel shame and disappointment. It's like staring the same old sin, eyes narrowed and grinning maliciously, right in the face and realizing just how ugly it is. The truth is, Satan is loving that I'm frustrated, loving that I'm starting to resent how busy things are getting, loving that I'm yearning for home more and more by the day! It makes me shudder to have an upclose look at myself like this, to see this area where I struggle, in fact where many struggle. I've had to stare down some awful truths about myself lately. Admittedly, I've grown a lot, but this project, if nothing else, has shown me just how much more room for growth there is, how much of my heart I've really made available to God, and how willing I am to live for His name.
Thinking about it now, I'm amazed at how much I'll be taking away from Halifax when I leave. How much I've learned about leadership, how important it is to delve into God's word for wisdom and spiritual food, how much I've learned about loving people, solving conflict, respecting others and myself... the list could go on. To fill you in, I just took a break from writing this entry to talk with some people back home - mom, my brother, and some good friends and C4Cers - and it's really been blessing to reconnect with people back home. Interesting thing though. As I talked with them and heard about all that's going on back home, I realize this: Stress and problems don't follow you around. They're everywhere. I've fallen into the pattern of thinking that says 'back home' means no stress, no busyness, no conflict or no pain and suffering (or seeing it in others). Really, though, there is no escape from those things. I don't mean to sound pessimistic, I just mean to say that those troubles are found everywhere - we're all human, and as long as we continue to follow our own ways, there are going to be problems. It just makes me that much more thankful that God is King! He rules whether I'm here in Halifax or back home, and I can find solace in him wherever I'm at.
Haha, I hope this is making sense. Anyways, enough about what's been going on in my head. I really wanted to share some of the highlights of this week!
God really orchestrated something cool this week: Katherine, a fellow projectile, met some students from a maritime collage in Maine who had stopped in Halifax on their way back from a trip around the Mediterranean. Once they got talking, one of them, a Christian, was really encouraged by our project and together they made plans to invite some of the students to the dorm for dinner and fun... so Tuesday night about 8 students made it over and we hosted them for an evening. What an encouraging night! Some of them were Chrisitans and were really interested in how we were witnessing to students around us, while others had never heard the gospel and were given a chance to. Plus, they were able to see what a tight-knit bunch we were, and how much we cared for one another here. It was really an amazing night, and I made some new friends too!
Today as well was packed. I didn't realize until I sat down and mentally went over everything we did, that we actually accomplished a lot. This morning was a series of seminars on how to share the gospel with different groups of people - randoms on the street, needy folks, people who resent the church, etc. Afterwards, Myriam and I were able to sit down and encourage Julia, a student at DAL who is trying to reach out to her parents. She doesn't believe they're saved, but because of past judgments from other Christians, she has trouble opening up discussion about it. It's a sensitive issue to be sure, and I wasn't sure what advice to offer, but God provided some on the spot wisdom, I will be praying for Julia and her family. The afternoon was filled with a barbecue, where I talked with a young couple who were looking for some people their own age to hang out with, and so Olga and I gave them our contact info and hopefully they'll be in touch soon. It's so nice to meet people in the community and just show them that we're not just people who meet on sunday mornings and keep to ourselves the rest of the week - it's really encouraged me to share my faith not so much intentionally as... naturally. To show my faith through my actions and words, and not just by going out of my way to approach people to share the gospel.
Saturday, June 30, 2007
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
What to say? So much happened in four days that I'm still reeling, trying to gather thoughts up. If ever there was a time I was running on God's strength and not my own, now would be it.
I think my first hint that these past few days were going to be intense was my meeting with my new discipler, Becky on Saturday morning. When she asked me how project was going, how I was feeling, and if there was anything I needed to discuss, I thought for a moment, and then very honestly responded, "No, actually, I think everything is fine..."
Now, before I continue, don't panic - everything is, for the most part, fine. I'm alive, very well, and the overall status here in Halifax is PTL - Praise The Lord! What I wasn't taking into consideration on Saturday morning was the fact that DRIME - Disciples Ready In Mobile Evangelism was meeting for the first time later that afternoon and choosing a leadership team for the remainder of the project. Nor did I take into consideration that I would be chosen as one of the leaders, or that in itself would create a conflict. Now, as said conflict is still being resolved in the most Christlike way possible, I'll refrain from going much farther on the subject, but suffice to say, with the leadership, appointed somewhat haphazardly as it were, in somewhat of a chaotic state as of Saturday evening, attempts to run further DRIME practices throughout the weekend were also somewhat... chaotic.
Some people might have come out of this weekend and found it to be a total waste, and if anyone from DRIME especially found this to be the case, then I'm truly sorry. However, I think God knew exactly what he was doing with all those assembled, and despite (or maybe because of) the conflicts that arose, he was able our own stubborn ideas and turn them on their heads. What I'm trying to say, in a few words, is that God really took a strange situation and has really opened the floor to some personal revelations and has really shown several of us projectiles what it means to be a servant leader, as well as how to trust his leadership above all else. So, yesterday evening, while I was feeling fairly peaceful about the situation, I was also feeling fairly exhausted and had totally planned to sit out FTWAP (Free Time With A Purpose, or "Footwap") in favour of what I felt was a well earned nap. However, when Nicole asked me if I'd like to meet up with her and Aram, a TESOL student from South Korea who was eager to learn about God, I couldn't really say 'No' - Just hours before I had been talking about my desire to spend more time evangelising and how I felt a lack of it in my life. So shortly after dinner ended, I found myself sipping tea in Nicole's apartment as the three of us, including Aram, went through the 'Knowing God Personally Booklet'.
Now, I don't think I have ever met anyone so eager as perhaps I was to hear and learn more about God than Aram was last night. From seeing Nicole's bible to finding out that she could to God - in Korean no less! - she was enthralled. The booklet itself proved to be a page-turner, as Aram excitedly went through it. If ever there was someone prepared by the Holy Spirit, she was it, and praise God, with so much thankfulness and joy Aram prayed to receive Christ last night! We have a new sister!! Nicole and I were nearly in tears over how joyful Aram was. I quickly slipped out to grab the key to the storage for all of our real life kits, which include a copy of the new testament, when I saw Steve and told him the news and where I was headed. Holding up a finger, he went into his room and returned with a brand new bible, still in its wrapping. Apparently there was an extra left over from something... anyways, imagine my joy to present Aram with her very own copy of the whole bible. It was truly an amazing night, and I won't forget it soon. Please pray for Aram and her walk as a new believer in Christ! I will keep you all posted on her progress as Nicole and I follow her up!
Blessings!
I think my first hint that these past few days were going to be intense was my meeting with my new discipler, Becky on Saturday morning. When she asked me how project was going, how I was feeling, and if there was anything I needed to discuss, I thought for a moment, and then very honestly responded, "No, actually, I think everything is fine..."
Now, before I continue, don't panic - everything is, for the most part, fine. I'm alive, very well, and the overall status here in Halifax is PTL - Praise The Lord! What I wasn't taking into consideration on Saturday morning was the fact that DRIME - Disciples Ready In Mobile Evangelism was meeting for the first time later that afternoon and choosing a leadership team for the remainder of the project. Nor did I take into consideration that I would be chosen as one of the leaders, or that in itself would create a conflict. Now, as said conflict is still being resolved in the most Christlike way possible, I'll refrain from going much farther on the subject, but suffice to say, with the leadership, appointed somewhat haphazardly as it were, in somewhat of a chaotic state as of Saturday evening, attempts to run further DRIME practices throughout the weekend were also somewhat... chaotic.
Some people might have come out of this weekend and found it to be a total waste, and if anyone from DRIME especially found this to be the case, then I'm truly sorry. However, I think God knew exactly what he was doing with all those assembled, and despite (or maybe because of) the conflicts that arose, he was able our own stubborn ideas and turn them on their heads. What I'm trying to say, in a few words, is that God really took a strange situation and has really opened the floor to some personal revelations and has really shown several of us projectiles what it means to be a servant leader, as well as how to trust his leadership above all else. So, yesterday evening, while I was feeling fairly peaceful about the situation, I was also feeling fairly exhausted and had totally planned to sit out FTWAP (Free Time With A Purpose, or "Footwap") in favour of what I felt was a well earned nap. However, when Nicole asked me if I'd like to meet up with her and Aram, a TESOL student from South Korea who was eager to learn about God, I couldn't really say 'No' - Just hours before I had been talking about my desire to spend more time evangelising and how I felt a lack of it in my life. So shortly after dinner ended, I found myself sipping tea in Nicole's apartment as the three of us, including Aram, went through the 'Knowing God Personally Booklet'.
Now, I don't think I have ever met anyone so eager as perhaps I was to hear and learn more about God than Aram was last night. From seeing Nicole's bible to finding out that she could to God - in Korean no less! - she was enthralled. The booklet itself proved to be a page-turner, as Aram excitedly went through it. If ever there was someone prepared by the Holy Spirit, she was it, and praise God, with so much thankfulness and joy Aram prayed to receive Christ last night! We have a new sister!! Nicole and I were nearly in tears over how joyful Aram was. I quickly slipped out to grab the key to the storage for all of our real life kits, which include a copy of the new testament, when I saw Steve and told him the news and where I was headed. Holding up a finger, he went into his room and returned with a brand new bible, still in its wrapping. Apparently there was an extra left over from something... anyways, imagine my joy to present Aram with her very own copy of the whole bible. It was truly an amazing night, and I won't forget it soon. Please pray for Aram and her walk as a new believer in Christ! I will keep you all posted on her progress as Nicole and I follow her up!
Blessings!
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Much to say
Hey everyone! It's been a while since I've been able to sit down and share with you about life here in Halifax, but I assure you I'm alive and getting better by the day.
Since I last wrote, we've done outreaches and gone camping, seen the staff leave, and I got a sinus infection that was healed quite miraculously overnight. God's been amazing, that's for sure. Life in Halifax grows more challenging by the day - not because things are getting any more difficult necessarily, but because things are getting comfortable. Now that we're not all out of our element and getting to know each other and the city, it's easier to slack off a little, to leave those dishes till later, or it's less important to go explore the city and meet new people. It's never good to get into ruts. The staff left us on tuesday - we had a final barbeque to send them off right, and I think that's done well to jolt us all a little into realizing how much initiative we need to take in our daily lives here. We've all been assigned to a different ministry, partly based on our requests, and partly based upon what the staff have been observing. I was placed on the memory book team, which is in charge of making everyone a small token of some kind (typically in the form of a book) to take home with them and remember project by. To be honest, even though I put it near the top of my choices for ministry, I was a little disappointed that I didn't get assigned somewhere else. I spend all year in design, and for someone who plans on entering into that career field, I'm actually not that excited about being identified as a designer. Strange, but true. So it was at first a frustration, and even more so when I found out how small our budget was, and, well... I'll be honest. I got upset. Not angry upset, but teary upset. I'm not sure why, but I think in part it was because I was realizing I was being prideful, and being selfish, just as much as I was wanting to bring forth a really cool memory item. It's a breaking moment when you realize you're being petty or foolish in the eyes of God over something so small.
And that's in part what I'm learning about on project - there are lots of little (and sometimes big) areas in my life that I'm really proud in. And not the good kind of pride. I mean, there's the "I know I worked hard and did a good job at this, and I'm pleased with myself", but there's also "No one can do this but me, NO ONE. Not even God", or "I'm great because ____". Or there's just placing oneself on a pedestal. I'm guilty of that one, that's for sure. I've really been convicted over the past few weeks that I really, really can't do anything without God's strength and wisdom guiding me. I mean, you can limp along all right without him - I did for nearly 21 years - but it's exhausting and unfulfilling, to say the very least. And being here on project, being brought here by God himself, and then being so busy with project itself to take time for God, I've noticed something. As exhausting as life before a relationship with God was, when you walk with the Spirit and yet don't take time for God, or more specifically allow him to lead you on his strength into something as engaging and demanding as project, and then basically refuse to drink deeply of him, it's even more exhausting. God really does give us all strength to do things we couldn't even dream of doing.
I've been thinking a lot about why I'm here. Not just why I'm on Halifax project, but why I'm even here on earth at all. Why and how I ended up in Halifax can be traced all the way back to last summer when I thought my life was about to end. If my boyfriend at the time hadn't decided to choose God over me, I might not be here today. That sounds funny, doesn't it? But it's true. Christ saved my life, and I felt so immediately thankful that I knew I had to tell others. And here I am today. I couldn't have even imagined last summer that I would be sitting in this apartment in Rice Residence, in Halifax, Nova Scotia, talking to you today about God's greatness and his providence, and above all else, his love. Had you asked me last June what I thought I would be doing, I probably would have said, "Moving in with my boyfriend and finishing my degree." It sounds typical, to most people, but had that come true, I would likely be a slave to sin still.
If this seems at all too much, don't worry - I'm trying to keep up myself. I've had a lot of chances to really sit down and converse with God over the last week - especially on the retreat at Kejimkujik (kah-jih-mh-koo-jik) National Park last weekend. For one glorious hour, sprawled on a blanket in the sun, in the middle of the Nova Scotian wilderness, I had solid talk with God over areas of my life that have not been left open to him. It's been hard since to hand over control, and realizing even more that I daily have to put my life, my job, my studies, everything into the hands of God has been very stretching. While project can be very exhausting at time, letting God be the pilot and being excited for real about what he's going to do, not what I'm going to do, has been a great joy.
Before I bring this to a close, I just want to make a few prayer requests. In relation to project, if you could pray right now (even as you read this!) that the remaining 10 or so people here who are seeking jobs would find them, that would be appreciated. Also pray for my safety at work, as I've burned and cut myself at least once so far in the past week, and pray for spiritual conversations...not just mentioning God in passing, but really expressing the love of the Lord for us and doing so in a meaningful way with my coworkers. Please pray specifically for one of my guy coworkers I will simply call J. He's had a rough life and has really turned over a new leaf. My heart goes out to him for all he's been through, and I see great potential in him. Pray for his salvation, and for God to just heal his heart and mind. Team unity would be a great thing to pray for as well. We're starting to really see the purpose in taking quiet time and making our time together meaningful and not 'surface', and I'm praying that we keep growing strong as a group, and that we do take time to reconnect with God on a daily basis.
Thank you all so much for your words of support and encouragement. I never noticed until someone pointed it out to me, but the word en-courage literally means 'to give courage'. When you encourage someone, it's giving them strength - firming up that core inside of them that drives them forward. I've definitely felt encouraged this past week.
That's all for now, folks. God bless, and have a great weekend!
Since I last wrote, we've done outreaches and gone camping, seen the staff leave, and I got a sinus infection that was healed quite miraculously overnight. God's been amazing, that's for sure. Life in Halifax grows more challenging by the day - not because things are getting any more difficult necessarily, but because things are getting comfortable. Now that we're not all out of our element and getting to know each other and the city, it's easier to slack off a little, to leave those dishes till later, or it's less important to go explore the city and meet new people. It's never good to get into ruts. The staff left us on tuesday - we had a final barbeque to send them off right, and I think that's done well to jolt us all a little into realizing how much initiative we need to take in our daily lives here. We've all been assigned to a different ministry, partly based on our requests, and partly based upon what the staff have been observing. I was placed on the memory book team, which is in charge of making everyone a small token of some kind (typically in the form of a book) to take home with them and remember project by. To be honest, even though I put it near the top of my choices for ministry, I was a little disappointed that I didn't get assigned somewhere else. I spend all year in design, and for someone who plans on entering into that career field, I'm actually not that excited about being identified as a designer. Strange, but true. So it was at first a frustration, and even more so when I found out how small our budget was, and, well... I'll be honest. I got upset. Not angry upset, but teary upset. I'm not sure why, but I think in part it was because I was realizing I was being prideful, and being selfish, just as much as I was wanting to bring forth a really cool memory item. It's a breaking moment when you realize you're being petty or foolish in the eyes of God over something so small.
And that's in part what I'm learning about on project - there are lots of little (and sometimes big) areas in my life that I'm really proud in. And not the good kind of pride. I mean, there's the "I know I worked hard and did a good job at this, and I'm pleased with myself", but there's also "No one can do this but me, NO ONE. Not even God", or "I'm great because ____". Or there's just placing oneself on a pedestal. I'm guilty of that one, that's for sure. I've really been convicted over the past few weeks that I really, really can't do anything without God's strength and wisdom guiding me. I mean, you can limp along all right without him - I did for nearly 21 years - but it's exhausting and unfulfilling, to say the very least. And being here on project, being brought here by God himself, and then being so busy with project itself to take time for God, I've noticed something. As exhausting as life before a relationship with God was, when you walk with the Spirit and yet don't take time for God, or more specifically allow him to lead you on his strength into something as engaging and demanding as project, and then basically refuse to drink deeply of him, it's even more exhausting. God really does give us all strength to do things we couldn't even dream of doing.
I've been thinking a lot about why I'm here. Not just why I'm on Halifax project, but why I'm even here on earth at all. Why and how I ended up in Halifax can be traced all the way back to last summer when I thought my life was about to end. If my boyfriend at the time hadn't decided to choose God over me, I might not be here today. That sounds funny, doesn't it? But it's true. Christ saved my life, and I felt so immediately thankful that I knew I had to tell others. And here I am today. I couldn't have even imagined last summer that I would be sitting in this apartment in Rice Residence, in Halifax, Nova Scotia, talking to you today about God's greatness and his providence, and above all else, his love. Had you asked me last June what I thought I would be doing, I probably would have said, "Moving in with my boyfriend and finishing my degree." It sounds typical, to most people, but had that come true, I would likely be a slave to sin still.
If this seems at all too much, don't worry - I'm trying to keep up myself. I've had a lot of chances to really sit down and converse with God over the last week - especially on the retreat at Kejimkujik (kah-jih-mh-koo-jik) National Park last weekend. For one glorious hour, sprawled on a blanket in the sun, in the middle of the Nova Scotian wilderness, I had solid talk with God over areas of my life that have not been left open to him. It's been hard since to hand over control, and realizing even more that I daily have to put my life, my job, my studies, everything into the hands of God has been very stretching. While project can be very exhausting at time, letting God be the pilot and being excited for real about what he's going to do, not what I'm going to do, has been a great joy.
Before I bring this to a close, I just want to make a few prayer requests. In relation to project, if you could pray right now (even as you read this!) that the remaining 10 or so people here who are seeking jobs would find them, that would be appreciated. Also pray for my safety at work, as I've burned and cut myself at least once so far in the past week, and pray for spiritual conversations...not just mentioning God in passing, but really expressing the love of the Lord for us and doing so in a meaningful way with my coworkers. Please pray specifically for one of my guy coworkers I will simply call J. He's had a rough life and has really turned over a new leaf. My heart goes out to him for all he's been through, and I see great potential in him. Pray for his salvation, and for God to just heal his heart and mind. Team unity would be a great thing to pray for as well. We're starting to really see the purpose in taking quiet time and making our time together meaningful and not 'surface', and I'm praying that we keep growing strong as a group, and that we do take time to reconnect with God on a daily basis.
Thank you all so much for your words of support and encouragement. I never noticed until someone pointed it out to me, but the word en-courage literally means 'to give courage'. When you encourage someone, it's giving them strength - firming up that core inside of them that drives them forward. I've definitely felt encouraged this past week.
That's all for now, folks. God bless, and have a great weekend!
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
A very blessed meeting
So this morning was the meeting with Lic. Karl Armstrong and Chris Drewe of West End Baptist. Steve, Katherine, Liz and I sat down to talk with them over what our definitive plans for partnering with them for the summer would look like, and the prognosis so far is very good. Right now, the plan goes as follows. We've decided upon 3 evenings where members of our team will teach interested congregants how to share the gospel effectively with coworkers, friends, and community members, and then the following weekend, the church will host a community barbeque where the people we trained can put their new skills into practice. We're also taking interested people out sharing with us, to get them acquainted with random evangelism and approaching members of the community. There is also a vacation bible school that they're interested in having us partner with, which I'm definitely interested in helping out with. What got me really excited, and I'm sure will excite other members of the team too, is the urban ministry that WEB is running currently, where people can come in off the street and grab grocery vouchers, sandwiches and other meals. Ideally, we'd help them take this further, and get more people involved from the community as well.
What was also cool was the way God totally paired us up according to need. WEB is currently looking for someone to lead summer worship, and wouldn't you know it, Liz has been appointed one of our Weekly/Worship leaders for the remainder of project, and would be thrilled to work with the church. As well, several of us students are planning to stay the entire month of August after the project ends (that includes myself) and will be needing a place to stay. Karl himself seems to have a house available for exactly that period of time... and there are many people that would likely offer their homes to us, by the sounds of it. It's really amazing to watch all of the pieces fall into place on this, and the more I see, the more I really would like to stay and watch this totally blossom for God. As I read through Corinthians, I empathize with Paul, who couldn't be with the church in Corinth but instead had to watch her growth from a distance after spending a fair bit of time there. It'll be hard to leave at the end of the summer (and hopefully things will go better than they did at Corinth!), and I'm praying sincerely that God'll direct me to where I'm meant to stay. If someone told me I could choose to go back to Toronto or stay in Halifax, no charge either way, I would choose Halifax without a second thought. I already feel connected to this place and the people here.
God's calling me to new levels of faithfulness every day, I'm just praying I can keep up...
What was also cool was the way God totally paired us up according to need. WEB is currently looking for someone to lead summer worship, and wouldn't you know it, Liz has been appointed one of our Weekly/Worship leaders for the remainder of project, and would be thrilled to work with the church. As well, several of us students are planning to stay the entire month of August after the project ends (that includes myself) and will be needing a place to stay. Karl himself seems to have a house available for exactly that period of time... and there are many people that would likely offer their homes to us, by the sounds of it. It's really amazing to watch all of the pieces fall into place on this, and the more I see, the more I really would like to stay and watch this totally blossom for God. As I read through Corinthians, I empathize with Paul, who couldn't be with the church in Corinth but instead had to watch her growth from a distance after spending a fair bit of time there. It'll be hard to leave at the end of the summer (and hopefully things will go better than they did at Corinth!), and I'm praying sincerely that God'll direct me to where I'm meant to stay. If someone told me I could choose to go back to Toronto or stay in Halifax, no charge either way, I would choose Halifax without a second thought. I already feel connected to this place and the people here.
God's calling me to new levels of faithfulness every day, I'm just praying I can keep up...
Monday, May 28, 2007
Well, the weekend has come and gone, with all of it's beautiful weather. Sitting here during the early evening hours on Monday, the sight outside of Nicki and Veronika's window is pretty damp looking. I don't want to say dismal or dreary, though. We need the rain just as much as we need the sun, and everything is looking greener and brighter than ever now that the fog has lifted. Halifax weather, like Halifax life, is unpredictable at best, and is constantly changing. Just because it was sunny yesterday doesn't mean it'll be sunny tomorrow, and just because there's rain today doesn't mean there'll be rain tomorrow. Just make the most of the day you're given, is the lesson, I guess, and make the most of it with a good attitude to boot.
I'm still deciding how much I've made of today. I got a wicked sunburn after sitting in the sun for an hour and a half on Sunday sharing with a girl named Jen. Our conversation was really great, and I really felt like she was someone I could connect with and talk with further, so I got her contact information and hopefully we can meet up for coffee tomorrow or sometime this week. She's seeking hard for truth, I'd say, but even though she just finished a degree in comparative religious studies, she hasn't found any definitive answers. Therefore I'm even more excited to get to take part in her journey. Pray for her and our newly budding relationship! :)
After such a frustrating week at work, Friday finally yielded an afternoon of purpose and vision. One of my coworkers came to me with a personal problem and we spent a good two hours talking about it and about work in general. It was a great chance to get to know her better and to speak into her about respecting herself as a person, as well as respecting others. It was a really groundbreaking time and as we parted ways she thanked me sincerely for allowing her to confide in me. I walked away almost soaring. I love getting to know people on a deeper level, and she's definitely become someone who is dear to my heart.
Backtracking a bit further, Thursday night was also fairly intense and exciting. My roommate Nicki breathlessly ran up to me and quickly explained that a close friend of hers who has been struggling with a drug addiction has finally reached the breaking point and is seriously searching for God and wanting to learn more about him and how she can turn her life around. Amazing news, and so close to my heart that I was happy for her, just to know where she could head potentially. If you could pray hard for Kendra and her search for God and renewal, I would appreciate it so much. Satan attempts to ensnare us in so many horrible ways... to find yourself entangled to the point of being trapped is the worst and best place to be... worst because you seem to have run out of energy and options, but best because God is good and forgiving, and would love nothing more than to save us from such traps... It gave me a shiver to think of what amazing love she's on the brink of discovering.
Tomorrow morning, Tuesday, we're meeting with West End Baptist Church to solidify plans to partner our citywide ministry with their outreach programs. God totally planned this... after the sunday morning service on outreach and sharing the gospel, we couldn't believe how blessed we were to have our proposition set up. The pastor was just as excited as we were and we've already got a number of ideas that will hopefully grow and take shape for the remainder of the project. Doubly exciting for myself is the chance through August to continue to partner with the church and get more involved in the community. It's going to be heartbreaking to go back to Toronto and school, but I'm also excited for the opportunities that await me there.
I appreciate your comments and prayers, as always!
I'm still deciding how much I've made of today. I got a wicked sunburn after sitting in the sun for an hour and a half on Sunday sharing with a girl named Jen. Our conversation was really great, and I really felt like she was someone I could connect with and talk with further, so I got her contact information and hopefully we can meet up for coffee tomorrow or sometime this week. She's seeking hard for truth, I'd say, but even though she just finished a degree in comparative religious studies, she hasn't found any definitive answers. Therefore I'm even more excited to get to take part in her journey. Pray for her and our newly budding relationship! :)
After such a frustrating week at work, Friday finally yielded an afternoon of purpose and vision. One of my coworkers came to me with a personal problem and we spent a good two hours talking about it and about work in general. It was a great chance to get to know her better and to speak into her about respecting herself as a person, as well as respecting others. It was a really groundbreaking time and as we parted ways she thanked me sincerely for allowing her to confide in me. I walked away almost soaring. I love getting to know people on a deeper level, and she's definitely become someone who is dear to my heart.
Backtracking a bit further, Thursday night was also fairly intense and exciting. My roommate Nicki breathlessly ran up to me and quickly explained that a close friend of hers who has been struggling with a drug addiction has finally reached the breaking point and is seriously searching for God and wanting to learn more about him and how she can turn her life around. Amazing news, and so close to my heart that I was happy for her, just to know where she could head potentially. If you could pray hard for Kendra and her search for God and renewal, I would appreciate it so much. Satan attempts to ensnare us in so many horrible ways... to find yourself entangled to the point of being trapped is the worst and best place to be... worst because you seem to have run out of energy and options, but best because God is good and forgiving, and would love nothing more than to save us from such traps... It gave me a shiver to think of what amazing love she's on the brink of discovering.
Tomorrow morning, Tuesday, we're meeting with West End Baptist Church to solidify plans to partner our citywide ministry with their outreach programs. God totally planned this... after the sunday morning service on outreach and sharing the gospel, we couldn't believe how blessed we were to have our proposition set up. The pastor was just as excited as we were and we've already got a number of ideas that will hopefully grow and take shape for the remainder of the project. Doubly exciting for myself is the chance through August to continue to partner with the church and get more involved in the community. It's going to be heartbreaking to go back to Toronto and school, but I'm also excited for the opportunities that await me there.
I appreciate your comments and prayers, as always!
Thursday, May 24, 2007
I think I wrote my previous post last... friday or saturday. Well, it's been quite a week since then, and I've come out a little worse for wear, but thoughtful.
I think I've mentioned before how getting to Halifax was a lesson in trusting God, but it wasn't the challenge I anticipated. Things seemed to fall into place fairly easily, as far as things go. If anything stressed me out, I've long since forgotten about the grief caused, which is more than some people here can say. I'm thankful for the faithfulness of God, to be sure.
But after getting through all of that, I knew I was just being geared for a bigger challenge, and I realized, once I started, that work was likely to be it. I don't want to be too 'revealing' here, but I do want to give you all a little peek at what's going on, to keep you in the loop and to keep the lines open for prayer.
On Monday I got talking with one of my coworkers about hanging out after work, which ended with us making plans to meet in the evening after her shift to watch Signal Hill play in the Lower Deck at work (the upside of working at a really large pub in Halifax). Ben and Katherine from project came with me and we all ended up having a great time, and got to know my coworker a little better. I really do want to get to know at least one or two of my coworkers fairly well before the end of the summer, but seeing as most of them are male, there are obstacles in that regard. Anyways, plans were made to go back to the pub for a second time on Tuesday, and this time around we met more of my coworkers and got to know them a little better. It's nice to have a group of my fellow teammates to help with conversations, and I think there's a lot of value in showing my coworkers that we're pretty normal people, with one or two exceptions. My not drinking was a big deal to pretty much everyone there who wasn't on project, as we were in a pub. But it lead to some talk of church and faith, and gave me a little more to work with, as such. The night was very draining though. We started upstairs in the 'Beer Market' (the middle floor of the restaurant) and ended up watching the band downstairs in the Lower Deck. It was more crowded than the night before and people were a bit rowdier. I stuck close to our guys because of the very pointed leers of a particularly drunk businessman (the downside of visiting a really large pub in Halifax), and it reminded me of the need to be conscious of our surroundings and of the people I bring into my workplace. I'm more used to that kind of setting, but I know many people here haven't every been in that kind of environment where people just give themselves over to their desires, basically, be it food or drink or lust. What was upsetting for me personally though was seeing some of my coworkers, who felt either lonliness or some kind of lust, or whatever, start to cozy up to one another, in particular the girl I had met with the night before. It reminded me a lot of the emptiness I used to feel and the way I tried to fill it up with exactly those pursuits, and just how hurt and empty it made me feel afterwards. I didn't want to judge, because I'd been in her place before, but I wish I could have just yelled at her right then and there that she could find fulfillment in much better ways... It's the same with many of my coworkers. Seeing them pour their energy into empty pursuits is draining to watch, and I'm also faced with a bit of a stigma, or the fact that I'm a novelty, because I'm one of the only practicing Christians in the building. I did learn today that one of the other new hires is actually also a Christian, and is in a Christian band! Unexpected suprise much? Anyways, things at work are rough. Added to that is the problem created by project itself versus work - that project time and prime time in the restaurant industry both happen to be the evening and weekends. My boss is starting to look at my name at the schedule and wonder why he hired me again. It's a frustrating situation, because I am personally very committed to working with these people and ministering to them (one of the reasons I came on project), but project itself is sort of defeating the cause. I'm learning a lot, and I can already see growth and positive change in myself, but I feel like I am literally being torn in two.
Anyways, I don't want to drive too far down that path. Things are being set in motion that will hopefully give everyone a bit more peace in this area. I've had to scale back my social time with teammates in order to maintain my internal sanity, which is in part why I was able to write an entry tonight. To go from living with just yourself plus family to living very closely with 29 other people is an intense shift, and I'm starting to realize the value in solid quiet time, and actually using the quiet moments to be with God or my thoughts, and not just zone out. There's been a lot of spiritual battles fought in the past few days, and I guess I'm not liking that I'm finding myself currently embroiled in one. God's been showing me a lot about real love, and not the man-woman kind, but the G0d-human or human-human kind. That things aren't always rosey and nice, but we're still called to serve and love all the same. This city is easy to love on the nice sunny days, or when the people are fun and friendly, but can you actually say you love the city when it's cold and rainy, and people seem to ignore you or be caught up or busy? What about people themselves? Do you love someone only when they're happy or when they're healthy... or as I started to realize today, when they're hurting? How can you love someone when their life is totally normal and nothing seems to be going on?
I made an interesting observation today. During prayer, I had a minor breakdown, thanks to the lack of private time to just sit down and cry. So I had a few people come over to me in the middle of prayer and eagerly tell me nice things and such. I appreciate them and truly believe that they spoke with good intentions, but it felt like almost a pounce, that people eagerly stepped in to comfort... without understanding why they were comforting. It made me realize something. At that moment, yes, I was feeling pretty sore inside (or else I wouldn't have needed to cry!), but there wasn't anything WRONG with me, per se, no hurt that needed anything but God... actually, the only thing I could say that was wrong was that I'd been so busy in the past few days that I had been holding my breath spiritually, and had started to suffocate. But rather than letting me explain further, or just be, people felt the need to pour on praise or encouragement. I guess what I'm getting at is, it felt a little fake or contrived, and it gave me vision as to how I don't want to be with the people I meet here or with my coworkers. I want to be real. Really real, and get to know people in a really real way. Just as God is really real, and not some hocus pocus make-believe to me, something that I dreamed up one day. God is a really real part of my life, and he's made a huge impact. I didn't really realize until today what I meant when I said in the past I want to be 'real' with people, but I realized in part what that would look like today. I hope that all made sense, I'm still working through in my head what this all means. I don't want to show up at work on Aug. 2 (the day after project ends) and suddenly revert to the 'normal, non-project Erin', thus voiding the Erin that everyone got to know over the summer previously. I've been praying it over, and I'd appreciate if some of you would also lift this up in prayer (apart from the other huge things that are contained in this post), the idea of giving up drinking almost totally. It's kind of a shock to me, but the more I think about it, the more I think this is a really good choice for me and for people around me. My pride wants to make me think that I can have just one or two and be 'okay' but past experience in recent months has taught me otherwise. It also depends on the company I've got with me. Drinking with 'carnal' Chrisitans or non-Christians and drinking with Christians who are solid in their faith and are walking with God have provided two totally different experiences, and the latter is pretty much normal to the point of positive as far as drinking experiences go. So I don't want to be legalistic and say no drinking ever, and then miss out on enjoying a drink or two with good people. I guess I'm processing what my boundaries are going to be, and it's kind of neat to be honest. I went through the same thing when I thought about dating again, and it revealed a lot about how I've changed and grown in my commitment to God. But that's another entry enitrely.
Whew, so sorry this was a long one, I hope that I made some semblance of sense through the whole thing. I just wanted to get an update up.
Oh sheesh, and I haven't even talked about PROJECT stuff. I'm on the city-wide Movement Development Area team (MDA team, for short), which means we're going to be focusing our efforts less on students per se, and more on the general population of Halifax. This Saturday we're hitting the streets for some random evangelism and then hopefully going door to door with quick surveys to get an idea of the spiritual 'climate' of the city. I'm pretty excited. We haven't really gone sharing since the first week here, and while I want to share at work, I want to get to know my coworkers better, so as not just to preach at them but to work with them etc. There's a different level of connection with random evangelism and surveys, and people are actually a lot more candid when you don't know them. So if you could lift up the team in your prayers on friday night or saturday, that'd be great!
Okay, for real, I'm out for the night. Hopefully updates will be a bit more frequent, as I try to spend more quality time here at home.
Peace.
I think I've mentioned before how getting to Halifax was a lesson in trusting God, but it wasn't the challenge I anticipated. Things seemed to fall into place fairly easily, as far as things go. If anything stressed me out, I've long since forgotten about the grief caused, which is more than some people here can say. I'm thankful for the faithfulness of God, to be sure.
But after getting through all of that, I knew I was just being geared for a bigger challenge, and I realized, once I started, that work was likely to be it. I don't want to be too 'revealing' here, but I do want to give you all a little peek at what's going on, to keep you in the loop and to keep the lines open for prayer.
On Monday I got talking with one of my coworkers about hanging out after work, which ended with us making plans to meet in the evening after her shift to watch Signal Hill play in the Lower Deck at work (the upside of working at a really large pub in Halifax). Ben and Katherine from project came with me and we all ended up having a great time, and got to know my coworker a little better. I really do want to get to know at least one or two of my coworkers fairly well before the end of the summer, but seeing as most of them are male, there are obstacles in that regard. Anyways, plans were made to go back to the pub for a second time on Tuesday, and this time around we met more of my coworkers and got to know them a little better. It's nice to have a group of my fellow teammates to help with conversations, and I think there's a lot of value in showing my coworkers that we're pretty normal people, with one or two exceptions. My not drinking was a big deal to pretty much everyone there who wasn't on project, as we were in a pub. But it lead to some talk of church and faith, and gave me a little more to work with, as such. The night was very draining though. We started upstairs in the 'Beer Market' (the middle floor of the restaurant) and ended up watching the band downstairs in the Lower Deck. It was more crowded than the night before and people were a bit rowdier. I stuck close to our guys because of the very pointed leers of a particularly drunk businessman (the downside of visiting a really large pub in Halifax), and it reminded me of the need to be conscious of our surroundings and of the people I bring into my workplace. I'm more used to that kind of setting, but I know many people here haven't every been in that kind of environment where people just give themselves over to their desires, basically, be it food or drink or lust. What was upsetting for me personally though was seeing some of my coworkers, who felt either lonliness or some kind of lust, or whatever, start to cozy up to one another, in particular the girl I had met with the night before. It reminded me a lot of the emptiness I used to feel and the way I tried to fill it up with exactly those pursuits, and just how hurt and empty it made me feel afterwards. I didn't want to judge, because I'd been in her place before, but I wish I could have just yelled at her right then and there that she could find fulfillment in much better ways... It's the same with many of my coworkers. Seeing them pour their energy into empty pursuits is draining to watch, and I'm also faced with a bit of a stigma, or the fact that I'm a novelty, because I'm one of the only practicing Christians in the building. I did learn today that one of the other new hires is actually also a Christian, and is in a Christian band! Unexpected suprise much? Anyways, things at work are rough. Added to that is the problem created by project itself versus work - that project time and prime time in the restaurant industry both happen to be the evening and weekends. My boss is starting to look at my name at the schedule and wonder why he hired me again. It's a frustrating situation, because I am personally very committed to working with these people and ministering to them (one of the reasons I came on project), but project itself is sort of defeating the cause. I'm learning a lot, and I can already see growth and positive change in myself, but I feel like I am literally being torn in two.
Anyways, I don't want to drive too far down that path. Things are being set in motion that will hopefully give everyone a bit more peace in this area. I've had to scale back my social time with teammates in order to maintain my internal sanity, which is in part why I was able to write an entry tonight. To go from living with just yourself plus family to living very closely with 29 other people is an intense shift, and I'm starting to realize the value in solid quiet time, and actually using the quiet moments to be with God or my thoughts, and not just zone out. There's been a lot of spiritual battles fought in the past few days, and I guess I'm not liking that I'm finding myself currently embroiled in one. God's been showing me a lot about real love, and not the man-woman kind, but the G0d-human or human-human kind. That things aren't always rosey and nice, but we're still called to serve and love all the same. This city is easy to love on the nice sunny days, or when the people are fun and friendly, but can you actually say you love the city when it's cold and rainy, and people seem to ignore you or be caught up or busy? What about people themselves? Do you love someone only when they're happy or when they're healthy... or as I started to realize today, when they're hurting? How can you love someone when their life is totally normal and nothing seems to be going on?
I made an interesting observation today. During prayer, I had a minor breakdown, thanks to the lack of private time to just sit down and cry. So I had a few people come over to me in the middle of prayer and eagerly tell me nice things and such. I appreciate them and truly believe that they spoke with good intentions, but it felt like almost a pounce, that people eagerly stepped in to comfort... without understanding why they were comforting. It made me realize something. At that moment, yes, I was feeling pretty sore inside (or else I wouldn't have needed to cry!), but there wasn't anything WRONG with me, per se, no hurt that needed anything but God... actually, the only thing I could say that was wrong was that I'd been so busy in the past few days that I had been holding my breath spiritually, and had started to suffocate. But rather than letting me explain further, or just be, people felt the need to pour on praise or encouragement. I guess what I'm getting at is, it felt a little fake or contrived, and it gave me vision as to how I don't want to be with the people I meet here or with my coworkers. I want to be real. Really real, and get to know people in a really real way. Just as God is really real, and not some hocus pocus make-believe to me, something that I dreamed up one day. God is a really real part of my life, and he's made a huge impact. I didn't really realize until today what I meant when I said in the past I want to be 'real' with people, but I realized in part what that would look like today. I hope that all made sense, I'm still working through in my head what this all means. I don't want to show up at work on Aug. 2 (the day after project ends) and suddenly revert to the 'normal, non-project Erin', thus voiding the Erin that everyone got to know over the summer previously. I've been praying it over, and I'd appreciate if some of you would also lift this up in prayer (apart from the other huge things that are contained in this post), the idea of giving up drinking almost totally. It's kind of a shock to me, but the more I think about it, the more I think this is a really good choice for me and for people around me. My pride wants to make me think that I can have just one or two and be 'okay' but past experience in recent months has taught me otherwise. It also depends on the company I've got with me. Drinking with 'carnal' Chrisitans or non-Christians and drinking with Christians who are solid in their faith and are walking with God have provided two totally different experiences, and the latter is pretty much normal to the point of positive as far as drinking experiences go. So I don't want to be legalistic and say no drinking ever, and then miss out on enjoying a drink or two with good people. I guess I'm processing what my boundaries are going to be, and it's kind of neat to be honest. I went through the same thing when I thought about dating again, and it revealed a lot about how I've changed and grown in my commitment to God. But that's another entry enitrely.
Whew, so sorry this was a long one, I hope that I made some semblance of sense through the whole thing. I just wanted to get an update up.
Oh sheesh, and I haven't even talked about PROJECT stuff. I'm on the city-wide Movement Development Area team (MDA team, for short), which means we're going to be focusing our efforts less on students per se, and more on the general population of Halifax. This Saturday we're hitting the streets for some random evangelism and then hopefully going door to door with quick surveys to get an idea of the spiritual 'climate' of the city. I'm pretty excited. We haven't really gone sharing since the first week here, and while I want to share at work, I want to get to know my coworkers better, so as not just to preach at them but to work with them etc. There's a different level of connection with random evangelism and surveys, and people are actually a lot more candid when you don't know them. So if you could lift up the team in your prayers on friday night or saturday, that'd be great!
Okay, for real, I'm out for the night. Hopefully updates will be a bit more frequent, as I try to spend more quality time here at home.
Peace.
(I got halfway through writing this thought, was interrupted and saved the entry to finish and post at a later date. Here is as far as I got... a new update will be up soon.)
Thanks to those of you who have been writing comments and emails - knowing people at home are thinking of me/us and praying for me/us is really encouraging. Life in the Halibubble (Halifax bubble!) is going well. The honeymoon phase is starting wear off, as we all knew it inevitably would, but there are a lot of really solid people here and so most conflicts seem to be resolved fairly quickly. If you could keep the unity of the team and personality clashes in your prayers though, I know that would be appreciated by everyone here.
Since starting work, I've been thinking a lot about God and what it means to be here, how I got here, and what the rest of this summer is going to look like. When I was in Scotland and realized that I had to go to Halifax, I didn't really ask questions (which was totally the opposite from when I realized that I had to go to Scotland... live and learn!). I applied, prayed (prayed a lot) and waited. When I was accepted, I admit that I expected to get all of my support in immediately, thinking I was an 'old pro' at raising support. Duh, God's doing the real raising, and of course he wants to challenge me in my faith. And God provided (and them some), and I did grow in faith. Even getting a job, which required due effort on my part, was relatively 'easy', all thanks going to God. As we prepared to leave for Halifax, I couldn't help but wonder how I got off so easy. My little 'push' came to a lot of 'shove' in most of the situations I encountered. God is a great provider, for sure, and all he requires is faith. Thinking about it a bit more though, and as I mentioned earlier, I wondered what that meant for the rest of my summer, how work would actually be and what would it be like to spend 3 months living in the Halibubble. I realized that God hadn't made things 'easy' for me, but had been preparing me and my stubborn heart, just as I'd been praying. My biggest challenge wasn't going to be getting here, it was going to be being here. Breaking new ground in a new workplace with a much rougher set of coworkers, being in an environment that I admit presents a huge temptation on many levels - many of my coworkers are my age or slightly older and male, and conversations frequently circle around drinking, sex, and other worldly things. My challenge is to love these people where they're at. To not not act above them (ie look down upon them) or drop to their level, but meet them where they're at. Frightening, if you're me, who is most of the time 'loveably awkward' in conversation, or quietly focused. The only one I can rely on is God, and I'm seeing that more and more. I love God so much, and I'm so thankful for the person he's forming me into.
I got a chance to share my testimony with a few of my teammates last night, which was a bit shocking for one of them considering the 'graphic' nature of some parts. I'm a very honest person, I'll say that much. It was so encouraging for all of us though, especially (and oddly enough), me. I haven't given my full testimony in a while, and as I did give it, I had much clearer picture of God and my own womanhood. It was exhilerating. I 'celebrated' 9 months of walking with God last Sunday, a number whose significance isn't lost on me.
I'm a little sad that I didn't continue on with my last thought, but I've sort of forgotten where I was going with that. 9 months seems significant I suppose in that it takes 9 months for a human child to come to full term and then is born into the world. I know we are reborn as children of God in an instant, really. Within a breath or two your whole life can change. Thinking further on the analogy, if you think about the way we recreate, I think we can see into God's mind a bit deeper. In a few breathless moments, a child can be conceived, but it takes time for that child to go from conception to birth, and from birth into a full grown human. Our spiritual growth seem to trend in a similar way. Milk, then solid food (in reference to 1 Corinthians, haha - anyone here in the Halibubble reading this blog will get it, and for the rest of you, it's what we're studying currently) . Anyways, that's all I can conclude about that thought... I'll get into more recent news in a new post.
Thanks to those of you who have been writing comments and emails - knowing people at home are thinking of me/us and praying for me/us is really encouraging. Life in the Halibubble (Halifax bubble!) is going well. The honeymoon phase is starting wear off, as we all knew it inevitably would, but there are a lot of really solid people here and so most conflicts seem to be resolved fairly quickly. If you could keep the unity of the team and personality clashes in your prayers though, I know that would be appreciated by everyone here.
Since starting work, I've been thinking a lot about God and what it means to be here, how I got here, and what the rest of this summer is going to look like. When I was in Scotland and realized that I had to go to Halifax, I didn't really ask questions (which was totally the opposite from when I realized that I had to go to Scotland... live and learn!). I applied, prayed (prayed a lot) and waited. When I was accepted, I admit that I expected to get all of my support in immediately, thinking I was an 'old pro' at raising support. Duh, God's doing the real raising, and of course he wants to challenge me in my faith. And God provided (and them some), and I did grow in faith. Even getting a job, which required due effort on my part, was relatively 'easy', all thanks going to God. As we prepared to leave for Halifax, I couldn't help but wonder how I got off so easy. My little 'push' came to a lot of 'shove' in most of the situations I encountered. God is a great provider, for sure, and all he requires is faith. Thinking about it a bit more though, and as I mentioned earlier, I wondered what that meant for the rest of my summer, how work would actually be and what would it be like to spend 3 months living in the Halibubble. I realized that God hadn't made things 'easy' for me, but had been preparing me and my stubborn heart, just as I'd been praying. My biggest challenge wasn't going to be getting here, it was going to be being here. Breaking new ground in a new workplace with a much rougher set of coworkers, being in an environment that I admit presents a huge temptation on many levels - many of my coworkers are my age or slightly older and male, and conversations frequently circle around drinking, sex, and other worldly things. My challenge is to love these people where they're at. To not not act above them (ie look down upon them) or drop to their level, but meet them where they're at. Frightening, if you're me, who is most of the time 'loveably awkward' in conversation, or quietly focused. The only one I can rely on is God, and I'm seeing that more and more. I love God so much, and I'm so thankful for the person he's forming me into.
I got a chance to share my testimony with a few of my teammates last night, which was a bit shocking for one of them considering the 'graphic' nature of some parts. I'm a very honest person, I'll say that much. It was so encouraging for all of us though, especially (and oddly enough), me. I haven't given my full testimony in a while, and as I did give it, I had much clearer picture of God and my own womanhood. It was exhilerating. I 'celebrated' 9 months of walking with God last Sunday, a number whose significance isn't lost on me.
I'm a little sad that I didn't continue on with my last thought, but I've sort of forgotten where I was going with that. 9 months seems significant I suppose in that it takes 9 months for a human child to come to full term and then is born into the world. I know we are reborn as children of God in an instant, really. Within a breath or two your whole life can change. Thinking further on the analogy, if you think about the way we recreate, I think we can see into God's mind a bit deeper. In a few breathless moments, a child can be conceived, but it takes time for that child to go from conception to birth, and from birth into a full grown human. Our spiritual growth seem to trend in a similar way. Milk, then solid food (in reference to 1 Corinthians, haha - anyone here in the Halibubble reading this blog will get it, and for the rest of you, it's what we're studying currently) . Anyways, that's all I can conclude about that thought... I'll get into more recent news in a new post.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
It's a beautiful, sunny day here in Halifax. Not at all cold and dreary. The temperature for today is supposed to be around 28 degrees, which is AWESOME. Hopefully once I'm done my chores I'll have a chance to get out and enjoy some of it. I would be going out with the others and helping them hunt for jobs, but my feet have a few really nasty blisters on them from all of our walking, and I work tomorrow, so I'm giving them a bit of a break.
Speaking of work, for those who don't know, I got a job last week at the Lower Deck as a line cook. Not totally glamorous, but a totally interesting place to work. They seat about 500 people a DAY, so it's a big leap from what I"m used to at the Tea Room. Easily the busiest restaurant in Halifax... pray for my sanity, haha! Seriously though, I was warned that as a Christian I might find myself uncomfortable there. I trust that it's the right place for me to be, but I'd appreciate prayers of protection and endurance.
Being in Halifax means a weird mix of feelings. On the one hand, it's a new city and I don't know my way around as well as I'd like to, I don't know the best places to go for this or that, etc. But on the other hand, it feels a lot like Sarnia, so I feel right at home. I like Halifax a lot, and I wouldn't mind living here. It's definitely a place I could see myself putting down roots as well as planting seeds in (take that however you'd like to take it, hahaha). Spiritually, it's a very open place...
OH! I just realized how long it's been since I shared with you all. We went out sharing faith for the first time on tuesday night. My partner Ben and I met with 3 different people - please pray for Kaitlin (sp?) who is Catholic and interested in coming to our weekly meetings, Jill who is very interested in learning more about Christianity, and Rodrigo and Bethany, who we met at the end of the evening and ended up hanging out with at Rodrigo's soccer game where we met some of Bethany's friends. Whew. It was a really exciting night for Ben and I, as the people we met were very friendly and open to hearing the Gospel/about God. This city is unique from other Canadian cities like Toronto, or Hamilton (yes I realize there are other cities other than those two..) in that people are actually willing to talk to strangers, and get to be friends with them. Polar opposite from the culture in Scotland actually. At the end of the evening, we had 2 people pray to recieve Christ and they will be 'followed up' throughout the summer! Their names are Denise and Vivy, please pray for our new sisters!
It's amazing how quickly we settled into being a team. We're already sharing living spaces, cutlery, advice, recipes, encouragement... it's like we've known everyone forever, but still have lots to learn. I love my roommates, and we get along great so far. Sure there are little conflicts, but we're all pretty mature (me and my bubbles being the possible exception ;o)) so they're easily overcome. God's really put something amazing together for this summer. I'm so very, very excited.
Olga and I had a really interesting experience last night. There is a small group of German university students studying here at St. Mary's for the summer, and Olga met one of them (Sylvia) in the elevator of our building the other day. Last night, the three of us, plus two other guys from their team, Mirco and Roland (don't forget to rrrroll that R!) went out for "drinks" (virgin caesars for Olga and I... blech!!) and talked about all kinds of cultural differences and what we're studying. It was amusing, to say the least. Their English is very good, so it wasn't hard to communicate. It turns out that Sylvia is a Christian too, but we're not sure about the guys. We enjoyed hanging out and talking and they all want to hang out with us again, so I'm excited for that. It's good to get out and meet people and make connections, rather than staying around in my own 'Christian bubble'. My first challenge was actually declining to drink alcohol last night. Going out for drinks for me usually involves actually drinking alcohol, but I didn't this time. I can't say that awful caesar was a great reward, but it did speak about who Olga and I are as people.
There's lots I could write about, but I think that's enough for now... I'll include some contact information for you all, because I LOVE getting things. Definitely do not hesitate to send me your mailing address, as postcards and letters are just as fun to write as they are to receive!
Erin MacMillan
Apt. #704 Rice Residence
Saint Mary's University
Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada
B3H 3C3
(902) 491-8668 ext. 3186 (I cannot make outgoing long distance calls from this number, but I can definitely receive incoming ones!)
outside-the-lines(at)hotmail(dot)com (you know what to do with those words in the brackets!)
Blessings!
Erin
Speaking of work, for those who don't know, I got a job last week at the Lower Deck as a line cook. Not totally glamorous, but a totally interesting place to work. They seat about 500 people a DAY, so it's a big leap from what I"m used to at the Tea Room. Easily the busiest restaurant in Halifax... pray for my sanity, haha! Seriously though, I was warned that as a Christian I might find myself uncomfortable there. I trust that it's the right place for me to be, but I'd appreciate prayers of protection and endurance.
Being in Halifax means a weird mix of feelings. On the one hand, it's a new city and I don't know my way around as well as I'd like to, I don't know the best places to go for this or that, etc. But on the other hand, it feels a lot like Sarnia, so I feel right at home. I like Halifax a lot, and I wouldn't mind living here. It's definitely a place I could see myself putting down roots as well as planting seeds in (take that however you'd like to take it, hahaha). Spiritually, it's a very open place...
OH! I just realized how long it's been since I shared with you all. We went out sharing faith for the first time on tuesday night. My partner Ben and I met with 3 different people - please pray for Kaitlin (sp?) who is Catholic and interested in coming to our weekly meetings, Jill who is very interested in learning more about Christianity, and Rodrigo and Bethany, who we met at the end of the evening and ended up hanging out with at Rodrigo's soccer game where we met some of Bethany's friends. Whew. It was a really exciting night for Ben and I, as the people we met were very friendly and open to hearing the Gospel/about God. This city is unique from other Canadian cities like Toronto, or Hamilton (yes I realize there are other cities other than those two..) in that people are actually willing to talk to strangers, and get to be friends with them. Polar opposite from the culture in Scotland actually. At the end of the evening, we had 2 people pray to recieve Christ and they will be 'followed up' throughout the summer! Their names are Denise and Vivy, please pray for our new sisters!
It's amazing how quickly we settled into being a team. We're already sharing living spaces, cutlery, advice, recipes, encouragement... it's like we've known everyone forever, but still have lots to learn. I love my roommates, and we get along great so far. Sure there are little conflicts, but we're all pretty mature (me and my bubbles being the possible exception ;o)) so they're easily overcome. God's really put something amazing together for this summer. I'm so very, very excited.
Olga and I had a really interesting experience last night. There is a small group of German university students studying here at St. Mary's for the summer, and Olga met one of them (Sylvia) in the elevator of our building the other day. Last night, the three of us, plus two other guys from their team, Mirco and Roland (don't forget to rrrroll that R!) went out for "drinks" (virgin caesars for Olga and I... blech!!) and talked about all kinds of cultural differences and what we're studying. It was amusing, to say the least. Their English is very good, so it wasn't hard to communicate. It turns out that Sylvia is a Christian too, but we're not sure about the guys. We enjoyed hanging out and talking and they all want to hang out with us again, so I'm excited for that. It's good to get out and meet people and make connections, rather than staying around in my own 'Christian bubble'. My first challenge was actually declining to drink alcohol last night. Going out for drinks for me usually involves actually drinking alcohol, but I didn't this time. I can't say that awful caesar was a great reward, but it did speak about who Olga and I are as people.
There's lots I could write about, but I think that's enough for now... I'll include some contact information for you all, because I LOVE getting things. Definitely do not hesitate to send me your mailing address, as postcards and letters are just as fun to write as they are to receive!
Erin MacMillan
Apt. #704 Rice Residence
Saint Mary's University
Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada
B3H 3C3
(902) 491-8668 ext. 3186 (I cannot make outgoing long distance calls from this number, but I can definitely receive incoming ones!)
outside-the-lines(at)hotmail(dot)com (you know what to do with those words in the brackets!)
Blessings!
Erin
Friday, May 04, 2007
Hey folks! Wow, what to say first... I'm here with my suitemates, chatting with them about how I don't even know where to begin this post. These past three days alone have been a big adventure. Through it all, I've really been realizing how God really works in the most average and everyday situations. Part of the attraction of taking the bus to Halifax was the great amount of trust we had to put in God to see everything through. In case you didn't know, Olga and I only had our bus tickets bought up to Montreal... beyond that, we weren't sure if we could catch our later connections. But, God is so good, and we had beautiful weather and no major hassles the whole way there. Minor things like a lack of sleep on the overnight ride meant a long sleepy day through New Brunswick, but we arrived safe and sound on Thursday night.
What can I tell you about Halifax? It's hilly. Everything slopes down towards the harbor, so you're either walking uphill, or downhill most of the time. The houses are much more unique here than they are back home, and it's a bit colder. I have to say, I love it here. There's something about this city...
Today was a great day though. I spent my morning applying for jobs aaaand... I'm now a line cook at the Lower Deck pub! Pretty sweet, and definitely praise-worthy event. I'll update you on how that goes. Anyways, I'm keeping the roomies up, so I'll shut down for the night.
Cheers, and God bless everyone!
What can I tell you about Halifax? It's hilly. Everything slopes down towards the harbor, so you're either walking uphill, or downhill most of the time. The houses are much more unique here than they are back home, and it's a bit colder. I have to say, I love it here. There's something about this city...
Today was a great day though. I spent my morning applying for jobs aaaand... I'm now a line cook at the Lower Deck pub! Pretty sweet, and definitely praise-worthy event. I'll update you on how that goes. Anyways, I'm keeping the roomies up, so I'll shut down for the night.
Cheers, and God bless everyone!
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go...
Well folks, this is pretty much it. In about 4 hours I'll be up and closing one chapter of this year, and opening another one. Amazing. It's finally here. I'm sorry I haven't begun 'my story' yet. These past two days have been a lot of running around and organizing, and reorganizing. You will be utterly amazed at how much you can fit into 2 suitcases and a carry-on these days. So much for 'packing light'...
I have to say, today was totally crazy. Nothing I expected, that's for sure. I ended up running all my last minute errands with Tricia, and that involved printing off her letter for her STINT in Panama! Glad I could be involved. :) By the end of the afternoon, I had my last chunk of support sent to head office, done the letters, bought a cute skirt and two new tops, socks, and a TEAPOT. And I copied some of the best recipes out of the binders from work. So we're eatin' well this summer! I can't wait!
As I was heading out for my last run, I managed to see a very good friend (the best) on the way, and we ended up catching up this evening. Unexpected, but really good. I've missed her! I had what I think will be my last drink of the summer before heading home to wrap up some last minute details.
This is really happening. Tomorrow morning, Olga and I will board a bus and zoom off for the summer. God was amazingly faithful in bringing in all of my support on time, the people he's surrounded me with... every corner I turned today I couldn't help but feel totally blessed. I'm expecting big things this summer. Pray big everyone. :)
Speaking of prayer, if you're reading this and feel called to, please pray for our travels tomorrow and Thursday. We've got some awkward late night layovers and spots where we're stepping out in faith concerning purchasing tickets. Also, pray for our general safety. I've got no reason to believe things will be anything but ordinary, but you've all heard crazy travel stories before. I'm down with meeting interesting people - that's part of the adventure! But I'd like to stay safe in the long run!
Before I wrap this up and grab a few hours of sleep, I have to share a fun fact: In organizing myself for a massive resume drop-off on Friday morning, I was looking up the addresses for all of the restaurants I'm applying to. I grinned when I saw where the Comfy Corner Cafe is located. After all these years of being a Trews fan, I'm actually going to stand on the corner of Hollis and Morris Street.
Standing on the corner of Hollis
and Morris street
Where the evil other half do meet
Won't you send me a saint from
grace, round here there's none
to be had
Hmm. I haven't really listened to these lyrics in a while. They've got interesting new meaning now...
...See you all this weekend!
I have to say, today was totally crazy. Nothing I expected, that's for sure. I ended up running all my last minute errands with Tricia, and that involved printing off her letter for her STINT in Panama! Glad I could be involved. :) By the end of the afternoon, I had my last chunk of support sent to head office, done the letters, bought a cute skirt and two new tops, socks, and a TEAPOT. And I copied some of the best recipes out of the binders from work. So we're eatin' well this summer! I can't wait!
As I was heading out for my last run, I managed to see a very good friend (the best) on the way, and we ended up catching up this evening. Unexpected, but really good. I've missed her! I had what I think will be my last drink of the summer before heading home to wrap up some last minute details.
This is really happening. Tomorrow morning, Olga and I will board a bus and zoom off for the summer. God was amazingly faithful in bringing in all of my support on time, the people he's surrounded me with... every corner I turned today I couldn't help but feel totally blessed. I'm expecting big things this summer. Pray big everyone. :)
Speaking of prayer, if you're reading this and feel called to, please pray for our travels tomorrow and Thursday. We've got some awkward late night layovers and spots where we're stepping out in faith concerning purchasing tickets. Also, pray for our general safety. I've got no reason to believe things will be anything but ordinary, but you've all heard crazy travel stories before. I'm down with meeting interesting people - that's part of the adventure! But I'd like to stay safe in the long run!
Before I wrap this up and grab a few hours of sleep, I have to share a fun fact: In organizing myself for a massive resume drop-off on Friday morning, I was looking up the addresses for all of the restaurants I'm applying to. I grinned when I saw where the Comfy Corner Cafe is located. After all these years of being a Trews fan, I'm actually going to stand on the corner of Hollis and Morris Street.
Standing on the corner of Hollis
and Morris street
Where the evil other half do meet
Won't you send me a saint from
grace, round here there's none
to be had
Hmm. I haven't really listened to these lyrics in a while. They've got interesting new meaning now...
...See you all this weekend!
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Okay, okay, okay...
Okay.
So, I must seem all over the board here. Our first post obviously is all about me being a brand spankin' new Christian, and then the next post is all about Kidmax... and then... a mission trip?! Actually, this will be the second one this year...
It's pretty phenomenal, when you think about it. I mean, seeing it on the page there gives me goosebumps suddenly, and I actually lived it! I'd been a Christian 2 months when I started this blog, and I definitely hadn't foreseen the events of 2007. Considering where I was at spiritually, and relationally in my life, you could have offered the chance to go Scotland or Halifax to me and I would have jumped on it... but if you had told me I would be a missionary, I probably would have... well, I wouldn't have believed you. But as we rang in the New Year at Winter Conference, my heart was singing in tune with God. He had chosen, and I was going to Scotland. I had no idea how, and I was pretty sure I wouldn't measure up, but... well, I'll save that particular story for another day. Before I leave for Halifax, I'd like to spend my time unpacking a bit of my walk with God with everyone. For some of you, you've been by my side almost constantly since the beginning, and so I thank you and dedicate these words to you. Your faithfulness has been such an encouragement. To those of you who feel you played what seemed like a minor or inconsequential role, I assure you, you are dear and worthy, and you are not forgotten!
So from here on in, a series of entries that map out roughly the last 8 or 9 months of the journey. Feel free to ask me questions, add your comments, etc. I'd love to get an idea of who's reading! :)
Okay.
So, I must seem all over the board here. Our first post obviously is all about me being a brand spankin' new Christian, and then the next post is all about Kidmax... and then... a mission trip?! Actually, this will be the second one this year...
It's pretty phenomenal, when you think about it. I mean, seeing it on the page there gives me goosebumps suddenly, and I actually lived it! I'd been a Christian 2 months when I started this blog, and I definitely hadn't foreseen the events of 2007. Considering where I was at spiritually, and relationally in my life, you could have offered the chance to go Scotland or Halifax to me and I would have jumped on it... but if you had told me I would be a missionary, I probably would have... well, I wouldn't have believed you. But as we rang in the New Year at Winter Conference, my heart was singing in tune with God. He had chosen, and I was going to Scotland. I had no idea how, and I was pretty sure I wouldn't measure up, but... well, I'll save that particular story for another day. Before I leave for Halifax, I'd like to spend my time unpacking a bit of my walk with God with everyone. For some of you, you've been by my side almost constantly since the beginning, and so I thank you and dedicate these words to you. Your faithfulness has been such an encouragement. To those of you who feel you played what seemed like a minor or inconsequential role, I assure you, you are dear and worthy, and you are not forgotten!
So from here on in, a series of entries that map out roughly the last 8 or 9 months of the journey. Feel free to ask me questions, add your comments, etc. I'd love to get an idea of who's reading! :)
Thursday, April 26, 2007
How much can you pack into eight months?
Apparently, quite a bit. I'll do justice to everything that's happened since last September in a few days, but for now I want to say hey to everyone and give you a little info.
So in about 6 days, (5 if you factor in the night I'm staying in Toronto), I will be departing for beautiful Halifax, Nova Scotia for the summer, for yet another amazing adventure! So much has happened since I found I was going a few months ago, and God's been so faithful and so good. I can't say much else right now without spoiling upcoming updates - I want to keep some sort of order! So I'll just say that I hope to keep this updated at least on a bi-weekly basis while I'm down east, with news and prayer requests. I'm only $209 away from my support goal of $2150! That's amazing! Not only is God a provider in the monetary sense, He's also lead me into some new relationships that have really been an all-round encouragement. I can't say thank you enough to everyone who is supporting me with prayer and funds for this journey - your blessing means so much to me. Please stay tuned, and DO NOT HESITATE to email me with updates about your lives!
I'll post something more coherent after my exam is finished on Saturday. So long for now!
Oh, and I did give the blog a new look. A lighthouse is just a big lamp post, right? I thought it fit the the nautical theme for this summer!
So in about 6 days, (5 if you factor in the night I'm staying in Toronto), I will be departing for beautiful Halifax, Nova Scotia for the summer, for yet another amazing adventure! So much has happened since I found I was going a few months ago, and God's been so faithful and so good. I can't say much else right now without spoiling upcoming updates - I want to keep some sort of order! So I'll just say that I hope to keep this updated at least on a bi-weekly basis while I'm down east, with news and prayer requests. I'm only $209 away from my support goal of $2150! That's amazing! Not only is God a provider in the monetary sense, He's also lead me into some new relationships that have really been an all-round encouragement. I can't say thank you enough to everyone who is supporting me with prayer and funds for this journey - your blessing means so much to me. Please stay tuned, and DO NOT HESITATE to email me with updates about your lives!
I'll post something more coherent after my exam is finished on Saturday. So long for now!
Oh, and I did give the blog a new look. A lighthouse is just a big lamp post, right? I thought it fit the the nautical theme for this summer!
Saturday, November 11, 2006
Fall Into The Arms Of Another...
Okay, so, here's the deal.
I promise you I have a backlog of journal entries (written by hand) that I mean to upload to this blog... eventually. I didn't mean to start this blog and leave everyone hanging immediately following. In fact, I had a nice little entry introducing my church and homechurch all lined up, but just haven't had the time.
So, after the levity (ooh, 5 points!) of my first official post, comes a lighter second entry, short and sweet.
To quickly clue in those who are out of the loop, I go to a church in Oakville called The Meeting House. Every second weekend I volunteer at the cafe, and every weekend opposite cafe weekends, I volunteer with the three-year-olds kidmax program (sunday school) during the early service. Why give up my every sunday morning? Here's a clue:
I. Love. These. Kids.
In the few short weeks that I've been involved in TMH, I think my 2 hours a month with the wee ones has been one of the most beneficial experiences I've had so far in my walk. Maybe it's because I'm seeing the world through new, childlike eyes myself, or maybe it's just because I such a little kid myself, but I've gained so many little insights into my relationship with God through them, as well as relationships with other people. This past Sunday was no exception:
Maybe it was the full moon, maybe it was the halloween candy. Whatever it was, the kids - all 10 of them - were just off the wall. Emma and I definitely had our hands full. In the midst of handing out snacks and trying to clean up an attempt at crafts, one of the quieter girls, Lauryn, bumped my leg and held up a book. "Will you wead this fow me?" She asked so softly I could barely hear here above the general din. I love reading (even kids books), so I told her of course, and asked her where she'd like to sit. Pulling my hand, she tugged me down to the middle of the playroom floor, and as I opened the book, and before I could do anything, she plopped herself down into my lap. Worry instantly flashed across my mind - was this okay? There are rules these days about teachers hugging students, worried parents analyzing every stranger's glance... I cast a meaningful look at Emma, but she was otherwise engaged. Shrugging inwardly, I opened the book, and began reading. Other children gathered around in a semi-circle, all hushed and gazing intently at the illustrations as I read, an effect that was not lost on me. But all the while as I read, Lauryn sat, unaware of the niggling little worry at the back of my head.
Thinking back on it tonight as I brushed my teeth, though, something struck me. How easy it was for her to trust me! How automatic, the desire to find comfort in the arms (or lap) of another person, bigger, stronger than her (at least, in the physical sense). How often do we as adults want, or even need, to seek out that same comfort, that same physical and emotional embrace? We have this concept of 'personal space', no-touching policy, this generally cold and unfeeling attitude. We. Must. Keep. Everything. In. Side. How much do we stifle basic human relationships this way?
How much do we stifle our relationship with God this way? We may accept Christ as Lord and Savior, dedicate our lives to serving Him and in Him... but when a time comes where our feet fail, our strength wanes, and we become racked with worry, do we turn to others, or especially to Christ, with open arms? Or do we curl up into ourselves, trying to hide away the guilt or pain? And are we, those who have suffered through hurts and sorrows, drawing close to us those who reach out?
Her trust and her want for closeness just blew me away.
His trust and His love brought me back home again.
I promise you I have a backlog of journal entries (written by hand) that I mean to upload to this blog... eventually. I didn't mean to start this blog and leave everyone hanging immediately following. In fact, I had a nice little entry introducing my church and homechurch all lined up, but just haven't had the time.
So, after the levity (ooh, 5 points!) of my first official post, comes a lighter second entry, short and sweet.
To quickly clue in those who are out of the loop, I go to a church in Oakville called The Meeting House. Every second weekend I volunteer at the cafe, and every weekend opposite cafe weekends, I volunteer with the three-year-olds kidmax program (sunday school) during the early service. Why give up my every sunday morning? Here's a clue:
I. Love. These. Kids.
In the few short weeks that I've been involved in TMH, I think my 2 hours a month with the wee ones has been one of the most beneficial experiences I've had so far in my walk. Maybe it's because I'm seeing the world through new, childlike eyes myself, or maybe it's just because I such a little kid myself, but I've gained so many little insights into my relationship with God through them, as well as relationships with other people. This past Sunday was no exception:
Maybe it was the full moon, maybe it was the halloween candy. Whatever it was, the kids - all 10 of them - were just off the wall. Emma and I definitely had our hands full. In the midst of handing out snacks and trying to clean up an attempt at crafts, one of the quieter girls, Lauryn, bumped my leg and held up a book. "Will you wead this fow me?" She asked so softly I could barely hear here above the general din. I love reading (even kids books), so I told her of course, and asked her where she'd like to sit. Pulling my hand, she tugged me down to the middle of the playroom floor, and as I opened the book, and before I could do anything, she plopped herself down into my lap. Worry instantly flashed across my mind - was this okay? There are rules these days about teachers hugging students, worried parents analyzing every stranger's glance... I cast a meaningful look at Emma, but she was otherwise engaged. Shrugging inwardly, I opened the book, and began reading. Other children gathered around in a semi-circle, all hushed and gazing intently at the illustrations as I read, an effect that was not lost on me. But all the while as I read, Lauryn sat, unaware of the niggling little worry at the back of my head.
Thinking back on it tonight as I brushed my teeth, though, something struck me. How easy it was for her to trust me! How automatic, the desire to find comfort in the arms (or lap) of another person, bigger, stronger than her (at least, in the physical sense). How often do we as adults want, or even need, to seek out that same comfort, that same physical and emotional embrace? We have this concept of 'personal space', no-touching policy, this generally cold and unfeeling attitude. We. Must. Keep. Everything. In. Side. How much do we stifle basic human relationships this way?
How much do we stifle our relationship with God this way? We may accept Christ as Lord and Savior, dedicate our lives to serving Him and in Him... but when a time comes where our feet fail, our strength wanes, and we become racked with worry, do we turn to others, or especially to Christ, with open arms? Or do we curl up into ourselves, trying to hide away the guilt or pain? And are we, those who have suffered through hurts and sorrows, drawing close to us those who reach out?
Her trust and her want for closeness just blew me away.
His trust and His love brought me back home again.
Saturday, October 28, 2006
And So It Begins
Actually, it all began long before I even existed. :)
I want to welcome you warmly to the Lamp Post, my shining light at a small crossroads of the internet.
To those of who you don't know me, I'm a 3rd year university student who started her walk with God a little over two months ago. In the short span of time that has followed, I've been challenged, changed, and charged with passion in ways I never could have dreamed. Giving my life over to Jesus is the greatest and also most humbling experience in all of my life.
The moment my heart opened and my walk began, I knew that this was going to be an adventure that would have a lasting impact on my life. To go from being a cynical pantheist, raised in a secular/atheist home, to being a humbled sister in Christ on fire for God, took more than a little exploration and examination of myself and the world around me. It hasn't been an easy journey, but that's what's made it exciting.
I hope that this blog allows me to shine some of my light into the dark corners of the internet. I hope to share my experiences, past and present, in an honest and engaging manner with those who are seeking to seek, those who are seeking God, or those who have already found God. Walk alongside me as I am stretched by God and grow in my faith. Like a child, keep your eyes open and never stop asking questions. Make mistakes. Get messy. And know that God is there always to pick you up, dust you off, and urge you gently onward.
Thank you so much for stopping by! Visit often, say hello, and make yourself at home. Peace! :)
I want to welcome you warmly to the Lamp Post, my shining light at a small crossroads of the internet.
To those of who you don't know me, I'm a 3rd year university student who started her walk with God a little over two months ago. In the short span of time that has followed, I've been challenged, changed, and charged with passion in ways I never could have dreamed. Giving my life over to Jesus is the greatest and also most humbling experience in all of my life.
The moment my heart opened and my walk began, I knew that this was going to be an adventure that would have a lasting impact on my life. To go from being a cynical pantheist, raised in a secular/atheist home, to being a humbled sister in Christ on fire for God, took more than a little exploration and examination of myself and the world around me. It hasn't been an easy journey, but that's what's made it exciting.
I hope that this blog allows me to shine some of my light into the dark corners of the internet. I hope to share my experiences, past and present, in an honest and engaging manner with those who are seeking to seek, those who are seeking God, or those who have already found God. Walk alongside me as I am stretched by God and grow in my faith. Like a child, keep your eyes open and never stop asking questions. Make mistakes. Get messy. And know that God is there always to pick you up, dust you off, and urge you gently onward.
Thank you so much for stopping by! Visit often, say hello, and make yourself at home. Peace! :)
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