Thursday, April 24, 2008

And I Have No Idea Why There Was Suddenly A Train In The Front Yard, Either

Okay. I confess. I stayed up until 3 AM last night reading stories about the challenges of being a pregnant woman in this day and age, because even though I doubt I'll ever marry and have kids of my own, I'm still fascinated by babies(!) Even though I have way more important things to do, like you know, SLEEP.

So of course, when I finally did go to bed, I dreamed that I was not only pregnant, but pregnant with the world's biggest baby and could barely move under the weight of my massive abdomen. And then my water broke in my nana's kitchen - and boy did it ever break - and then my alarm went off at 9 AM.

Unfortunately, I hadn't had the 11 hours of sleep I had the previous night, else I would have laid in a half-conscious state and mentally childed myself for being stupid. I fell groggily back into bed until my boss called at 10 AM asking if I could work a few hours on what's looking to become a very heinous Saturday (I can't, unfortunately - Ottawa). I mustered all the faculties of speech I could to tell her so, and then collapsed back into bed.

And dreamed that I my nana's house now not only located somewhere in the hilly escarpment countryside, it going to be the temporary location for my workplace, complete with mismatched end tables draped in table cloths. As I stood in the kitchen wondering the obvious - what are the customers going to think when they realize the furniture doesn't all match - my boss (mother of the boss who called on the phone) wandered downstairs in a pink fluffy housecoat looking
miserable. She's not feeling well, but hey, now that we've got this great new location she can lie down on the overstuffed couch in the basement and not worry because oh I know you and the others will do such a great job you're such a great team, you dream team, you. And so she disappears downstairs and customers start arriving and asking for menus which I can't find because this a house and not a restaurant and where is the cook and hey come back here I need to finish explaining duties and shoot that woman sitting at the kitchen table is giving me the skunk eye. And then all my staff went off to play in the fields with the shirtless boys working outside next door and I was left trying to convince one of the customers to have a Gloucester instead of a Somerset, while wondering who in their right mind ever thought this was a good idea.

Who's going to stay up till 3 AM tonight? NOT ME!

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