Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Surreality

I woke up in the most confused of states this morning. One of the joys of possessing both an active imagination and a highly visual mental atmosphere seems to be a very vivid, realistic dream life. This morning's sleep-induced fantasy was exceptionally bizarre and contained enough reality that I lay in bed for a full 20 minutes sorting out whether I had a place to live in the fall and whether or not I needed to get on the phone and argue mum and dad into staying in Waterdown.

Dreams described in words are rarely ever as lucid, but essentially what happened seemed to stem from an offhand comment my dad made about he and mum leaving for Saudi Arabia to live eventually (though nowhere in the near future, thankfully). In the dream, my parents had not only decided they were moving to Ottawa - they had bought a house there, and traded our house here for a smaller one up the street. My brothers and I would continue to live in Waterdown while they left for an early retirement. This alone caused much mental chaos, as both of my brothers nowhere near secure in their future plans and aren't even working, while I'm struggling to pay for my last year of school... where will the money for groceries come from? How can I keep house and be a fuller than full-time student? Add to that the weirdness of buying the house from my childhood friend, and having to coordinate as we move their stuff into our old house and our stuff into theirs while mum and dad pack their bags and leave without so much as a kiss on the cheek and a wave...

It was all terribly confusing, but thank goodness it was a dream. It's not a good indication of my mental state though, is it?

And it makes me all the more nervous to visit Ottawa this weekend. Mustn't let my parents get any crazy ideas...

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